3 Ways Not to Lose Yourself to Motherhood


Nothing impacts your life more than having kids. They’re a true blessing but staying true to yourself while going through a lifestyle change is crucial. I became a mom six years ago and have been learning something new ever since. Below are my top tips to not lose yourself to motherhood.

1.     Prioritize Yourself

As selfish as it may sound, putting yourself first is kind of the backstory of Exclusively Ego. While the idea of being selfish is frowned upon in society, I think we don’t do it enough, especially as mothers. Whether it means losing sleep, losing friends, or losing your sense of style, there’s no true benefit to putting yourself last.

Self-care is crucial to your overall wellbeing. This doesn’t mean you drop everything a book a weekend staycation now, but baby steps can have a huge impact in the long run. Start with an at-home facial, wear something that makes you feel good, or get out of the house and get inspired. Whatever you do, make sure that it’s something you’re doing for yourself and yourself only.

2.     Find a Happy Medium

Becoming a mom is one of the biggest lifestyle changes a woman can go through. Life stops being about “me” and all about “we”. While perfect balance might not exist, happy mediums do. Respect and embrace your lifestyle change. Whether that means you leave your full-time job to be a stay at home mom, or you wake up three hours earlier to get a head start on your day, these are changes that necessary and sometimes inevitable.

Since having Itzarih, my style has evolved into “casual chic”. I’ve learned to combine my on-the-go lifestyle with stylish pieces that still translate what I do for a living. Becoming a mother is a beautiful thing. Make the best of it. Here’s how I break down my style description.

Casual = comfort, ease and laid back

Chic = stylish, sophisticated, and fashionable

3.     Ask for Help

Putting my pride (another definition of ego that I steer away from) aside was never easy. I used to think I could do everything myself. Maybe you can, but it might not lead to the best results. While there are a million reasons to ask for help, here are my top three.

-       Get a break/time off

Whether it’s a trip to a coffee shop, a walk around the block, or a trip to your favorite store, getting out of the house and taking a break does wonders. If finding the time or energy to do it seems impossible, try scheduling dates with yourself. Once a week, block one hour of your time to spend time with yourself. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.

-       Ask for outside perspective

Friends, family members, and fellow moms are great resources to reach out to when in doubt. As moms, we spend a lot of time in our heads and tend to forget that there are others out there going through similar struggles.

-       Ask for expert advice

Whether it’s a therapist, life coach, or personal stylist, getting an expert’s opinion on your concerns can be life-changing. Make a list of your top issues and decide which route would be the most efficient.